Couple Inspiration

We saw this story on Yahoo Shine and thought it was the cutest story.

Source: Yahoo Shine

This couple's parents were friends, and when they were 4 years old (in 1926), got dressed up as a bride and groom for a carnival. Turns out that they did eventually get married, when they were 21, and are still together in their 90's! They just celebrated their 70th anniversary.

An excerpt from the article:

"I do not think young couples nowadays try enough," she added. "After one argument they give up."

It's been 70 years, and the Everests are still happily married. Their secret?

"We promised to love, honour, and obey," Mr. Everest told the Dereham Times. "And I did all the obeying."

 Haha! Congratulations to the happy couple - they are truly inspirational :)

Wedding Organizer

A wedding organizer is a vital tool when planning your wedding. It can be a binder/folder chock full of ideas, notes, pictures of dresses or wedding decor, budgets, checklists, and more. Or, if creating one seems overwhelming to you, you can always go out to and buy a Wedding Planning book to help and guide you.

You can use a wedding organizer, even if you have a Wedding Coordinator/Planner handling your event. You also need to have information at your fingertips, and a place to jot down thoughts, ideas, phone numbers or websites, etc.

For the Nigerian bride, getting a book or organizer is especially essential, as our events tend to be grand. However, a lot of the planners out there, cater to western brides in the United States or Europe. Cakes and I were looking for something that could capture what we wanted. Our account on TheKnot.com, while helpful, can't quite grasp the tiny details that are specific to Nigerian culture/traditions. We'd also signed up on NaMyWedding.com, but their website lacks a proper budget, timeline and checklist.

Last weekend, during our Pre-Marital Counseling class at church, we noticed another couple holding a wedding organizer. Imagine our surprise and delight, when we saw that it was written/put together by a Nigerian and was full of contact details for vendors in Nigeria! In addition, it also passed our secret test - the budget chapter included a line item for SMALL CHOPS!!! (This is Berry's absolute favorite thing to eat at events.

Source - Bella Naija

We got The Essential Bridal Handbook by Funke Bucknor-Obruthe at The Hub at The Palms Mall in Lekki. Please note that it's quite pricey - N7500.00 (almost $50)! However, we believe that it IS valuable for what it offers - a Nigerian-centric organizer and directory.

LET THE PLANNING BEGIN!

Reblogged from Power of Prayer

The picture below has been making the rounds on Facebook, and we thought to share with you. It's pretty powerful and deep.

Source: Power of Prayer Tumblr

Excerpt of the post:

Moments before I was to walk down the aisle my soon to be mother in law came in the dressing room where my bridesmaids and I were all gushing with giggles and fluttering about finishing last minute details.

“Sweetheart, your groom has called for you!”.

In a nervous tizzy I said, “What?! I’m not ready! I have to get my shoes and…” She had already taken my hand and led me to a corner, where my groom was waiting. I barely sat down; I was filled with so much anticipation! So much excitement! So many nerves!

“Is he going to like my dress? Does my hair look pretty? Can he see me?!” 

Right around the corner sat my soon to be husband, I so was nervous he might see me yet secretly hoping to catch a glimpse of him. In my excited state I was the first to speak,

“Hi sweetie! We’re getting married today!”

“I know baby and I want to pray with you before we do.” 

There we sat around the corner hand in hand, and together we bowed our heads. People were rushing about; the wedding coordinator directing people here and there, the photographers snapping photos and the bridal party enjoying each others company. Yet in that moment, in the quietness of our hearts and minds, my husband and I were alone in the presence of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

My husband prayed that God would bless our marriage, that through thick or thin together we would never lose hope in one another. That instead of focusing on each others imperfections we would always rely on Christ’s perfection. That we would wake up every day and chose to love one another not through our own strength but by the power of Christ’s perfect love.

With our hands clenched tightly to one another together we said “Amen”, both with shaky voice and just like that I was whisked away to blot the tears off my face and put on my veil.

Now we're engaged. What next?

Girl meets boy.
Girl dates boy.
Boy proposes to girl.
Girl says YES!
Boy and Girl are happy.
And then, the whirlwind begins...

Source - Weddinglds.com

After a couple agrees formally to marry each other, the next few weeks, months, and sometimes years, become devoted to Wedding Planning. From invitations to guest lists to venue locations and dealing with vendors, it can (and has, in our case) seem too big to handle. Just when you think you have quite a bit of time to plan, the months become weeks, and weeks become days. Before you know it, 6 months turns into 6 hours!

The best way to deal with the impending flurry of wedding planning activity, is to break everything down, and start with a To-Do List.

Here is our To-Do List for the Newly Engaged Couple!

1. Set a TIMETABLE - How long do you want to wait before getting married? What season/month do you envision getting married in - Summer, Winter, Dry Season? That should give you an initial handle on how much time you have to plan.
   
2. Pick your WEDDING DATE - In Nigeria, this typically means confirming the date availability with your house of worship, as well as both families.
   
3. Inform your FAMILIES - In Nigeria, a wedding involves the bride and groom's family members, and sometimes even extended family. Before you can set any plans in stone, you need agreement from both sets of parents (it just makes life easier). Because cultural traditions are a huge deal in Nigeria, your parents can then give you advice on the "proper" timeline and schedule of events, e.g., Introduction, Dowry Payment, Traditional Marriage.
   
4. Dream Up Your WEDDING STYLE and Pick a LOCATION/VENUE - Are you thinking of a retro-themed wedding? Are you looking to have a Glitz and Glam affair? Do you even want to get married in Nigeria? (Destination weddings are fast becoming a trend amongst those who can afford it) Whatever your style is, start making plans towards it, and look for a ceremony/reception venue that falls within your preference. It's best to notify your reception venue choice EARLY, especially if you want to get married in December (hottest month for weddings in Nigeria). Also be ready to pay early, because it's usually First Pay, Only Booked!
   
5. Set a BUDGET - How much money do you HAVE, NOT WANT, to spend? How much are your families ready to contribute? There is absolutely no reason to go into debt simply because of a wedding. Don't forget that you'll still have to get a place to live, buy furniture, etc. Make a realistic budget that's within your means, and look for venues, vendors, and more that will work with your budget.
   
6. Draft a GUEST LIST - How many people do you want at your wedding? How many people do your parents want at the wedding? Come to a middle ground, and work with that list. If you're like us and want a small wedding, then get ready to deal with more than a few upset friends and extended relations.
   
7. Choose your WEDDING PARTY - Your bridal party should consist of those people who are closest to you, NOT chosen for you by anybody else! You want to have your best gals and guys surrounding you on that day. Keep in mind that the size of your bridal party should be relative to the size of your wedding. Would you have 20 bridesmaids, and 20 groomsmen, with a guest list of 100 people? It would look skewed.
   
   *Something we've noticed in Nigeria is that the bridal party is usually given barely more than a second's thought. We've seen where groomsmen aren't even told they're in the bridal party until a week before the wedding! That's plain rude and not being courteous. Please inform your chosen bridal party members EARLY, in case they need to save money, make travel arrangements, and more.*
   
8. Consider a CONSULTANT/WEDDING PLANNER - The bigger weddings are in Nigeria, the more sense it makes to hire a wedding planner. Weddings here tend to have 300-1000 guests, and it's best to use the services of professionals, so that you're not overwhelmed. In addition, they more than likely already have a list of vendors they use, so it would be easy for them to procure their services.
   
   These days, you don't even need to hire the planner for the whole planning period. You can hire someone to be the Wedding Day Coordinator. You would typically discuss your wedding plans with them beforehand, keeping them informed of EVERYTHING, so that they can adequately handle all the minute details on the wedding day.
   
9. Sign up on a WEDDING PLANNING WEBSITE or buy a WEDDING PLANNING BOOK - If you'd rather not hire a wedding planner, then sign up on a planning website or get necessary wedding literature to help you get started on the numerous items on the checklist. Regardless of whether you have a planner or not, it's a good idea to have a book or folder with all your wedding items, plans, inspiration and more, for easy reference.
   
   We're signed up on TheKnot.com and NaMyWedding.com. TheKnot has a wealth of information, but isn't really geared to the Nigerian bride/groom. NaMyWedding, while Nigerian-centered, is lacking a lot in the personal planning tools.
   
10. Sign up for PREMARITAL COUNSELING - Most churches in Nigeria will not marry you, if you have not gone through their marriage counseling sessions. In some churches, it lasts for 6 weeks. In other churches, six months! Find out early from your pastors or intended officiant, what the required procedures are and ensure that you get this out of the way BEFORE the wedding date. For couples who live abroad, concessions are usually made; e.g. intense counseling sessions packed into a 1 or 2-week period, OR doing it via the world wide web.

Once you've started on these items, you're well on your way to having the wedding of YOUR dreams! It can get hectic, but do your best to enjoy the journey, and take time out regularly, to relax with each other. Remember the marriage is what's important.

:)

Welcome to our blog!

Hello there!

We're Berry and Cakes! And we're getting married in 2013!!!

This blog will serve as our wedding website, and we will post regular updates about our wedding planning ideas.

We hope you like what you see :)